Sunday 25 September 2011

Amberleaf Angels

Amberleaf Angels

After TS Eliot

‘I have gone at dusk through narrow streets
And watched the smoke that rises from the pipes
Of lonely men’

They lean, quietly puffing,

on walls and fences

sporting pac-a-macs and flat caps.

I've seen the smoke that rises,

skims along the street on the light breeze.

It chokes and burns the throat

of the young girl at the bus stop

but the opaque clouds

of dirty lemon

hang and glide through the air

slow, free

and congregate outside the church

in an Amberleaf- Drum protest march

all the way down to the circle.

The girl splutters as it passes

and the haze disperses,
and a wisp of angels

rises into the ether.

I can solve all your problems

with a simple remedy of my own making.

Just sip this Nepenthe three times a day with meals

and over time the square patches left behind

by pictures will be covered by dark

oppressive modern wallpaper.

The pink towels stacked neatly in the cupboard

will turn a Bachelor shade of grey.

The ornamental vase that holds the gas key

and the radiator bleeding key

will better serve some charity shop.

The faint sweet smell in the air

will fade

and you'll wake up one day

in the centre of your own bed.

When I woke up this morning, you were almost here.

I stretched and my hand

reached over to you

and lay in the cold hollow in the pillow.

I could smell you on the sheets,

catch you moving in the air,

rising from the radiators

on convection currents.

In the kitchen, you'd left the light on.
The kettle, still throwing tiny spirals of steam,

sat innocently on the sideboard

waiting for closure.

Days like these

Days like these

when the fabric of time puckers at the seems

and tiny pieces of my future

seep

through.

I’m reminded of fragility,

and waste,

of the days to come

sat in waiting areas

praying to anyone who will hear me.

Thursday 22 September 2011

I year ago today we lost Dad.
I'll find him again....but as is my nature it might take me a while.
Keep a seat warm for me Dad.

Tuesday 20 September 2011

Well, sat in work wasting time until I have a lesson.
I've exhausted facebook and email and have resorted to writing dribble on the blog.

I've kind of been an aspiring grammar nazi over the last year. Mainly brought about because of my job and the strict criteria we have to follow to ensure students can 'use conventions' of syntax and paragraphing and 'the correct use of' apostrophes and commas.

Thing is, I can't do it. I don't know the rules. I don't see why there should be rules.
I have Dyslexic tendencies - which makes it easier to help students on a one-to-one basis by helping them develope coping mechanisms.

But on the other hand these people look up to me and say things like 'how do you spell abomin....abonim...abonimable......?' well, you get the idea. Miss is unable to help at this present moment in time due to a lexical computation error whereby I CANNOT SPELL!!!

So what if I can't spell. I'm not here to teach people to spell. I'm here to enspire them to pick up a dictionary and better themselves. I can do that.

Teaching has killed my love of language and expression. I need to change this.

Monday 19 September 2011

I have renamed the Blog again. (And I have a new look)
It's mainly because I have lost my way.
So much has happened over the last year that I have lost myself.... this is my way back home.


I'm not going to bore anyone with details.
Clean slate.